Reflection of a Servant

I live in a country where Islam is the biggest number. I was born as Muslim, and I’m so free to worship my Lord. My families and my community are Muslims. These are great mercies from Allah.
But, I often deny those favors.

I needed many years to decide wearing hijab. I chose to finish my job when the prayer call was reverberated. I put Qur’an on my back and chose others to read. Indeed, Allah has made my tongue easier to read His holy book, but I forget it to use as my light. Astaghfirullah…

In other time, as the hardship came to me, I came close… closer… closest to my Lord, complained my life. As the happiness came to me, I ran far… from my Lord, and claimed that was from myself.
It was shameful!!

In this holy month, I realized how many sins I’ve done. Yes, I’m the sinner… the wrongdoer. But I wasn’t shy to ask His paradise. How many years I walked in the wrong way to find the meaning of life. Today, I got it. I was asked to worship Him because I need Him. I was asked to do good deeds along my life, that’s only for me, not for Him. I need His love, I need His guidance.

O, Allah accept me as one of your righteous servants. I won’t ask your paradise again, I will ask Your love. Only Your love. It’s enough for me!

Teach me how to love You!

Teach me how to love Your messenger, Muhammad!

And guide me how to spread my love to the world!

I need You, I need Your love, O my Lord!

الحق من الله، والخطاء مني

14 thoughts on “Reflection of a Servant”

  1. Fatmawaty, Your post brought tears to my eyes because you are Muslim and I am Christian and, yet, I have felt exactly what you wrote about. When I was a child, my parents sent me to Catholic school. I was very close to God. Then my mind went towards the things of the world like getting married, getting a house, and buying a car. Then that seemed empty and I realize that nothing is more important than my relationship with God. My prayer on my birthday last week was that I steadfastly surrender to His will and in doing so perhaps be worthy of His love. We all need HIm.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m sorry if my post made you cry.
      Absolutely my dear Ginene! When we get His love, we don’t need anything else.
      You’re a great lady, my friend!
      I loved your words! Oh yes, accept please my congratulation, “Happy birthday my dear friend, God bless you! 😍

      Liked by 1 person

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